Conservative Republican Discussion Forums - 2 Minutes Laugh http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/ Jokes and Funny Pictures en Thu, 09 Sep 2010 23:24:58 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/images/misc/rss.png Conservative Republican Discussion Forums - 2 Minutes Laugh http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/ Remember that couple that snuck into the White House with no credentials? http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/remember-couple-snuck-into-white-house-no-credentials-28432/ Mon, 06 Sep 2010 22:05:11 GMT Image: http://live.drjays.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/barack_and_michelle_obama2.jpg Zing! (blatantly stolen from someone else)

Zing!

(blatantly stolen from someone else) ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh Brett http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/remember-couple-snuck-into-white-house-no-credentials-28432/ <![CDATA[The Queen's Riddle....]]> http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/queens-riddle-28365/ Wed, 01 Sep 2010 15:15:07 GMT Subject: The Queen's Riddle....

Barack Obama met with the Queen of England.

He asked her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient
government? Are there any tips you can give to me?"

"Well," said the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround
yourself with intelligent people."

Obama frowned, and then asked, "But how do I know the people around me
are really intelligent?"

The Queen took a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy; you just ask them to
answer an intelligent riddle." The Queen pushed a button on her
intercom.

"Please send Tony Blair in here, would you?"

Tony Blair walked into the room and said, "Yes, my Queen?"

The Queen smiled and said, "Answer me this please, Tony, your mother
and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your
sister.

Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Tony Blair answered, "That would be me."

"Yes! Very good," said the Queen.

Obama went back home to ask Joe Biden, his vice president the same
question. "Joe, answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a

child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure," said Biden. "Let me get back to you on that one..." He
went to his advisors and asked every one, but none could give him an

answer. Finally, he ended up in the men's room and recognized Colin
Powell's shoes in the next stall. Biden asked Powell, "Colin, can you

answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it's not
your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Colin Powell yelled back, "That's easy, it's me!"

Biden smiled, and said, "Thanks!" Then, he went back to speak with
Obama. "Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that
riddle.

It's Colin Powell!"

Obama got up, stomped over to Biden, and angrily yelled into his face,

"No! you idiot! It's Tony Blair!"

AND THAT MY FRIENDS IS PRECISELY WHAT'S GOING ON WITH OUR FEDERAL
GOVERNMENT IN WASHINGTON D.C. ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh Right Wing http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/queens-riddle-28365/ Obama at the Bat http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/obama-bat-28347/ Mon, 30 Aug 2010 17:02:15 GMT http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Tcah...ayer_embedded#!

Hilarious :) ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh Freedom http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/obama-bat-28347/ Realities of Life http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/realities-life-28280/ Wed, 25 Aug 2010 13:34:40 GMT Attachment 1045 (http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/attachments/2-minutes-laugh-19/1045-realities-life-.jpg) Some things speak to you Attachment 1045

Some things speak to you
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]]> 2 Minutes Laugh samspade http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/realities-life-28280/ Woman humor http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/woman-humor-28266/ Tue, 24 Aug 2010 04:14:42 GMT We got off the Titanic first.


* We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.

* We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

* Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous - guys look like complete idiots in ours.

* We can be groupies - Male groupies are stalkers.

* We can smile and get off speeding fines.

* Taxis stop for us.

* Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

* We don't look like a frog in a blender when we dance.

* Free drinks!

* Free dinners!

* We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

* We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

* We know the truth about whether size matters.

* Nothing crucial can be cut off with one clean sweep.

* It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

* No fashion faux pas we could make would ever rival Speedo's.

* We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

* If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

* We can congratulate our team mate without ever touching her ass.

* We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

* If we're dumb some people think it's cute.

* We have an excuse to be a total witch at least once a month.

* We can talk to people of the opposite sex without automatically picturing them naked.

* If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we look like an idiot.

* Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask if there is spinach in our teeth.

* There are times when chocolate really can solve all our problems.

* Gay waiters don't make us uncomfortable.

* We'll never regret piercing our ears.
* We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes. ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh samspade http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/woman-humor-28266/ Jokes http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/jokes-28265/ Tue, 24 Aug 2010 04:02:39 GMT "Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees.
"Yes, Sir." the employee replied.
"Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you."


Two women were comparing notes on the difficulties of running a small business.
"I started a new practice last year," the first one said. "I insist that each of my employees take at least a week off every three months."
"Why in the world would you do that?" the other asked.
She responded, "It's the best way I know of to learn which ones I can do without."


A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside.
One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along behind and filled in the hole. While one was digging a new hole, the other was about 25 feet behind filling in the old.
"Hold it, hold it," the fellow said to the men. "Can you tell me what's going on here with this digging?"
"Well, we work for the county government," one of the men said.
"But one of you is digging a hole and the other is filling it up. You're not accomplishing anything. Aren't you wasting the county's money?"
"You don't understand, mister," one of the men said, leaning on his shovel and wiping his brow. "Normally there's three of us, me, Joe and Mike. I dig the hole, Joe sticks in the tree and Mike here puts the dirt back."
"Yea," piped up Mike. "Now just because Joe is sick, that doesn't mean we can't work, does it?"



Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing their contract's sick-leave provisions.
One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper, "This man," he announced, "called in sick yesterday!" There, on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.
A union negotiator broke the silence in the room. "Wow," he said. "Think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"


The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office. "What is your name?" was the first thing the manager asked him.
"John," the new guy replied.
The manager scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of a namby-pamby place you worked at before, but I don't call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last name only - Smith, Jones, Baker ? that's all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"
The new guy sighed and said, "Darling. My name is John Darling."
"Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..." ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh samspade http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/jokes-28265/ White House Jester Beheaded http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/white-house-jester-beheaded-28264/ Tue, 24 Aug 2010 03:52:12 GMT Attachment 1043 (http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/attachments/2-minutes-laugh-19/1043-white-house-jester-beheaded-101.jpg) WASHINGTON—After serving 12 years in the position, Motley, the official White House Jester, was beheaded Tuesday after delivering a poorly received jape about the spiraling national debt before... Attachment 1043

WASHINGTON—After serving 12 years in the position, Motley, the official White House Jester, was beheaded Tuesday after delivering a poorly received jape about the spiraling national debt before President and Mrs. Obama.
"For crimes of great arrogance and cheek, His Idiocy the White House Jester has been sentenced to a swift demise," White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs said following the death sentence. "Let it be heard over every city and suburb of this land that the National Debt is no topic for frivolity, and the mailed hand of Obama shall smite all offenders."
Motley, who used his last words to beg in vain for Obama's mercy, was executed on the North Lawn at the strike of noon.

White House Jester Beheaded For Making Fun Of Soaring National Debt | The Onion - America's Finest News Source
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]]> 2 Minutes Laugh samspade http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/white-house-jester-beheaded-28264/ <![CDATA[Game & Question]]> http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/game-question-28232/ Sat, 21 Aug 2010 14:32:45 GMT I am sending this only to my smart friends. If I said I figured it out
I'd not be telling the truth; I had to look at the answer.


See if you can figure out what these words have in common.


1 Banana
2 Dresser
3 Grammar
4 Potato
5 Revive
6 Uneven
7 Assess


Are you peeking or have you already given up?
Give it another try. Look at each word carefully.


(You'll kick yourself when you discover the answer.)


Answer: No, it is not that they all have at least 2 double letters.

























Answer:
In all of the words listed, if you take the first letter, place it at the
end of the word, and then spell the word backwards, it will be the same
word.

 ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh samspade http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/game-question-28232/ Cat In A Hat http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/cat-hat-28154/ Sat, 14 Aug 2010 07:18:18 GMT .... Image: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v62/RazorUK/Political/UnkleSaminaCatsHat.jpg ....

]]> 2 Minutes Laugh Razor http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/cat-hat-28154/ New jobs http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/new-jobs-28119/ Wed, 11 Aug 2010 14:00:41 GMT President Obama announced this month that he created 70,000 new jobs. The bad news is, they are all vacation planners for him and his family Jay Leno President Obama announced this month that he created 70,000 new jobs. The bad news is, they are all vacation planners for him and his family

Jay Leno ]]> 2 Minutes Laugh samspade http://www.republicanoperative.com/forums/2-minutes-laugh-19/new-jobs-28119/