Her Wedding Dress


#1

A woman walked into a bridal shop and said she was going to be married for the fifth time and wanted a dress. The salesgirl asked her what style and what color did she prefer.
She said, "I want a floor-length white dress with a veil."
The sales clerk said that such a dress was usually reserved for first marriages when the presumption of “purity” was made–not after four other weddings.
Irritated, the woman said, "I know it’s hard to believe, but I’m just as ‘pure’ as I was for my first wedding.
“How did that happen?” asked the clerk.
“My first husband got so excited that he had a heart attack and died as he was checking into the hotel. My second husband passed out DURING the wedding, fell, hit his head on a pew and fractured his skull. He died the next day. My third husband and I got into a huge fight in the limo on the way to the airport for our honeymoon flight. We had that marriage annulled and I haven’t spoken to him since.”
“What about your fourth husband,” the clerk asked?
“Well, he was a Democrat. All he did was sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how great it was going to be, but nothing ever happened!”


#2

[quote=“Pappadave, post:1, topic:47945”]
A woman walked into a bridal shop and said she was going to be married for the fifth time and wanted a dress. The salesgirl asked her what style and what color did she prefer.
She said, "I want a floor-length white dress with a veil."
The sales clerk said that such a dress was usually reserved for first marriages when the presumption of “purity” was made–not after four other weddings.
Irritated, the woman said, "I know it’s hard to believe, but I’m just as ‘pure’ as I was for my first wedding.
“How did that happen?” asked the clerk.
“My first husband got so excited that he had a heart attack and died as he was checking into the hotel. My second husband passed out DURING the wedding, fell, hit his head on a pew and fractured his skull. He died the next day. My third husband and I got into a huge fight in the limo on the way to the airport for our honeymoon flight. We had that marriage annulled and I haven’t spoken to him since.”
“What about your fourth husband,” the clerk asked?
“Well, he was a Democrat. All he did was sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how great it was going to be, but nothing ever happened!”
[/quote]:coffee_spray: